My Happiness Project

As much as I have done and overcome in my short 28 years on Earth, I still find that I am indeed my own worst critic. My successes are short lived, only because I am constantly pushing myself to reach the next plateau. I think it may be the product of coming form the whiny and sometimes wandering millennial generation.  However, I also think that my projections come from being a black woman who has achieved many things that society sometimes deems it impossible for me to do.


Since I was a child, I found myself fighting a stereotype that I had yet to be confronted with.  It was something that was unseen at the age of five, but one that my parents, family members, and teachers had prepared me for.  At this age, half my mind was filled with all things Barbie related while the other was slowly developing a consciousness about my blackness,what it meant to be black, and how I had to not be what others expected.  In some ways, having this consciousness helped me to excel in many areas of my life.  However, as I have gotten older, it has become a battle. Being the black girl who does it all sometimes leads to isolation among my peers; not being able to do it all depresses me.


Over the past few weeks, I have become increasingly frustrated because life isn't changing as fast and as wonderful as I like it to.  I know, I know; I need to suck it up and be an adult! Still it is easier said than done when one has had this idea in their mind that they are deadest on.  As a reliever to my distress, I decided that whenever I started to feel that woe was indeed me, I will take out a piece of paper and list all the blessings and positive things in my life.  It may sound stupid but it definitely works; the trick is that even if your mind is thinking of a negative counter to that previous positive thought, you must move on an find yet another good thing.  I can list big things like having a vehicle or things that we take for granted like sight and smell. When I run out of things, which takes me a while to do, I can say to myself at least for a while that things are not that bad after all.


I highly recommend this exercise to all of the ladies black or white who feel like life is kicking their butts. I think if we all took a little more time to think about our blessings, we'd find out how truly fortunate we really are.